A newcomer's story

[justjudy]

My mediation session today went OK - under the circumstances. I will come out OK and what i really wanted was the house and thats what I think I will get so feeling settled and calm.

I had a prayer chain going among my family and friends sending me positive supportive vibes. I wore blue coz it makes me feel calm and lacy underwear coz it made me feel good!! Driving there I was saying out loud over and over "I am strong and serene" and I felt strong and serene. And I got a car park right out front.

He was not aggressive or greedy or petty. Quite the opposite in fact - quite vague and passive, a bit disorganised, he just seemed a shell of his usual (old) self. He agreed with all my valuations with hardly any debate, offered $$ over & above what he needs to pay me legally for child support. I am not interested in screwing him over, I am just after a fair division that sees me and my children protected financially and with a roof safely over our heads.

I am glad we are going down the mediation path rather than a legal confrontation - hopefully we can keep things amicable rather than becoming bitter. I think that keeps my DBing in with a better chance. I don't see working out a financial settlement as the end of DBing or our marriage. It just draws a line in the sand at this point in time financially, allowing us to move on with less baggage between us. Or at least that is how I intend to view it!

And lets be honest, while I totally don't want to be here doing this, the reality is that this is the situation I am faced with. Yes, I am being forced down a path that I absolutely DO NOT want to take but I am caught between a rock and a hard place so i might as well make that hard place as pleasant as I can. Positive mental attitude.