Sorry for how the other post looked. I was on my phone.

He was actually in for 7 days. Basically after the 72 hours he was told they didn't feel he was ready to leave and he could voluntarily stay or they would take additional action to keep him there. They wanted to be certain he was stabilized before letting him out.

He made several comments that made me think the depression is back. When I spoke to him this evening to relay what the county attorney said as well as S attorney he sounded very flat. Also, didn't really respond much. In addition, Sat when we were at police station with S we had gone out to get a pop and he said to me "You should have just let me kill myself. By now all of this would be over and done and everyone would have had closure." I didn't respond. He really didn't give me time to as he walked away but also I had no idea what to say.

I am not certain about the meth but I really am wondering. Something is just off. I can't place it. Drugs are always a possibility with his history.

Life is sort of running me over right now. More than ever I see how little I have control of. I just seem to be along for the ride. Many of the things that have happened I have had little to anything to do with. Yet it just continues.

I am very upset about a couple of other things. Like I was told no visitation for S. Apparently they did allow visitation and H went. Not to sound whiney or anything but he never said a word. One would think that if you are concerned with childs welfare you would have shared that. He never did. My thoughts are if it was the other way around I would have shared that info with H if for no other reason than thinking regardless of my feelings S needs all the support he can get. Does that make sense? H never ever said a word.

Also all the hoopla about how his phone was broke and all of that. Not true. He still is using the same phone just bought a new sim card. Not sure why he did that but he definitely had no intentions of telling me. He accidentally texted me from the new number. Texted S actually but he and I had traded phones.

Then tonight he said when I finally heard from him that he had just forgotten to ever turn his phone back on once we left the courthouse. I'm not really buying that one.

The flip side is as I said - he is very loving towards S. One of the things I noticed is how much touch there is. That probably sounds dumb. But literally he rubs his back, holds his hand, hugs him, pats his arm. Almost over kill. At one point I had to actually say do you think I might get a moment with him. I would like to think it is genuine. I sort of doubt it. Part of it, I think is him trying to cover his own butt for giving S the rifle.

I stupidly try to reason with H when I see him. Basically, at one point at the police station I said - do you realize she had 4 FB profiles that she was using? Why would she do those things? He never answered me, just got angry.

I have no idea what is going on with H and really could care less. Sadly I am moving into the ambivalent column. That;s bad because I realize how detrimental ambivalence is.

Any way, that is what has been happening. Not sure anyone can offer advice it just is what it is.

Thanks for being concerned my wonderful "imaginary" friends.