Labug - thank you. I'm not trying to be in her head, then again I'm not being in mine either I guess. I was ironically doing better when W and OM were an official item versus whatever they are now. Hope has caused me to backslide somewhat consistently lately.
Too long to type what I want to be via my phone, the vision of who I want to be.
I have thought about d/c'ing as her refriending has obviously added more anxiety and what not. I'll probably keep it, but not get on it as much. It is superficial I know.
I was angry over bff friending OM with W present. She knows my NC boundary. She even stated that she's friends with some of BFF's Ezra, and her H doesn't care. Guess W still views herbAL as nothing wrong (at least in that moment). Computer issues and child "sass" added to anger. I withdrew and kept to myself. I made a few angry comments. I asked W to leave me alone, to give me space. Then I worked out, and tried to make peace with W afterwards.
SIL and I are fairly close and she has been supportive of me along, at least until now, so her reported turn in opinion is what bothers me. It's not like her.
NG - thank you for stopping by and offering support. I need to regain ny confidence. I agree. That will also help me deflect / diffuse hiccups like these.
Busting - Thanks for your ongoing support. As stated I do need to refocus on ME. The hope thing is what sank me. The cuddling is nice, the not knowing about kisses here and there stinks, especially when is like more.
So in summary, focus on regaining my confidence. Focus on myself and who I want to be. Enjoy what I with W b/c at least it's better than what it was? Thoughts? And bring more 2 x 4s if necessary.
