I don't get why my wife gets to make all sorts of insults, but I can't defend myself? I mean she has been mean to me at times and I admit I have been mean back. I'm not proud of it. But this is what i mean when I say our marriage has been messed up for a while. It seemed that it was part for the course. Then we'd usually make up. then repeat. We did have a lot of good times too.
I am ready to focus on DB and the steps to get my wife back. I'm cutting back on the selfish attitude. However, I am torn between trying to do everything for my wife and being aloof and detached. Where is the balance? I want to pick up my work around the house and with the kids, but I know she takes a lot of pride in this. If I step on toes or mess up, she'll just get mad. Should I ask her to teach me how to do the laundry or how to mop the floors the way she likes it? Or do I back off. I'm confused.
I know I should back off, but I wanted to tell her that I was sorry for everything I did and why the marriage is in this state. I also I did tell her she looked nice for work and I also asked if could drop the kids off at school. She looked at me real funny and asked why? I told her that I just wanted to.
Last night, I asked her about the code on the computer and if she could take it off. She said that I could "earn" that back with trust. I'm not quite sure what she meant by that anyone have ideas. she doesn't know that I have a work around. I went a whole day without snooping though. However, she seems to be guarding her phone when I am around and keeping it under a pass code.
25. I am looking for a good councilor and one who is familiar with the DB process. I'm not telling my karen because I want this to be for me.
I am also looking at local retroville programs. Maybe I can convince her to attend. It might be my only hope here.
