I asked him to do it in a way that hopefully leaves me out of the equation. He said he would come up with a solution, and he did not want to add any stress to our situation. He wants his own wife back, and he wants me to have mine. I am placing a lot of trust in him. I hope it doesn't come back to bite me.
Of course it will. This is just setting up for disaster. Your W will find out what you're doing at some point, and she will say "yup, he's the same controlling, manipulative person he's always been, I don't know why I thought he could change." Your best course of action right now is to back away from this. Quit talking to the guy.
Originally Posted By: suckerpunch
I also gathered some information from a close friend of my wife and I. He spoke with her, and he feels the situation is basically what I suspected.
This could also be harmful, because since this is a mutual friend it WILL get back to your W that you were fishing for info. More controlling behavior. It is OK to talk to mutual friends, but NOT about the R. Talk to them about how great you are doing, what your GAL activities are, how good you feel and how much fun you're having. THAT is the kind of info you want getting back to your W, not that you're sad, lonely, depressed and pumping everyone you know for little rays of hope. The former will make your W realize you're detaching and she may very well start worrying she'll lose you. The latter will just reaffirm her belief that leaving you is the right thing to do.
