heeeeelllllppp!!

[25yearsmlc]

Okay,

I've been doing some thinking. I realized that I didn't have the best family role models growing up. My dad was verbally and physical abusive - mostly verbal though. I thought this was the way a relationship was supposed to be.

You could say that my marriage was pretty dysfunctional from the start. We both did a lot of no-nos like name calling, threatening divorce. No physical abuse but we used to throw things and stuff but nothing since the kids came. I simply don't know what a healthy marriage looks like. i have no idea. My ideas are coming from Modern Family and other tv shows. That can't be right.

A few years ago my wife went into councilling and I refused to go (this was before the almost affair) I thought it was for people who were really crazy. She kinda got things together and kept telling me that I needed to see someone. I refused. We kinda disconnected at that point and thats when I became emotional with my coworker.

so why aren't You in counselling now? You need it. You admit you have no idea how to treat your wife. You need the tools a good counselor can provide.

Admittedly, I have some motivation problems.

you mean you don't care enough to DO something? Or you don't want to, or what?

If the marriage and an intact family isn't a priority, then you'll lose it. A lot of people who DO care a great deal for their families, still lose them. But everyone who does NOT care much, definitely loses their family and marriage...