Welcome to catch-22

[Big Bruce]

Say, if you knew for absolute certain you and your wife would never get back together, would you will want to make these changes and change your priorities?

Ask yourself that

Well, this question makes me think that you guys must think that I was really bad, when in fact I was not that bad.
You might reply, well, if you weren't horrible, she wouldn't have left you.
Truth is, I was kind to her, seeking an emotional connection, listening to her, understanding her, helping at home, picking the baby from day care, then picking her up in the evening, cooking, cleaning the house, doing the repairs, going for walks together, sharing our dreams for the future, our love for books. I sold my motorbike and bought her a scooter. We would go out for dinner, we would talk about holidays here and there and plan for it, and we'd go!
It has been a wonderful start of marriage.
When the travail came, I took her to the hospital and held her hand till the baby came out. I was there for them, I loved and still love them, if not I wouldn't be here.

Then she moved to Canada, ahead of me.... and everything tipped.

Nobody, I say NOBODY, did understand that decision of hers. Our pastor, my parents, her friends, they all said : she seemed to be such a nice person, and you were getting along so well.. it was impossible to imagine that she would commit such a thing.

So yeah, I think I more or less get the gist of it: my best shot is to show a change for a long period of time.
See, your advice did not fall into the ears of a deaf person..

In the meantime, I need to get rid of pride, and the diminishing her hurt by recognizing that things weren't as rosy as I thought. I must refuse self-righteousness, and start refocusing on my family, making myself interested in the life of my son, and her life. And, be patient.

Did I summed it up well?