Lonely, thank you for your post. I read it carefully and thought about how I can apply what you said to my sitch.
I'd already decided to just give all my love and compassion to my H during this process. Our last couple of conversations have been good. I felt more comfortable, and so did he. We're going to see each other on Monday after 2 months. Last time we saw each other was at the first meeting with the L.
My decision now is, do I continue this "friendship" path even when the D is final (which might take longer than I thought, since he hasn't done anything about it after he filed) or stop all contact with him and move on with my life? I know staying in touch won't let me move on emotionally.
I feel that my H and I are meant to be together, but he doesn't feel this way. When I told him I felt we were soulmates, he said he didn't feel the same. He's said he's checked out, that he doesn't even want to think about how our M could've improved. He's focused on "dating" other women, which your W didn't do, right? Plus this decision took him about 2 years to make, while it seems that you and your W got D really quickly (which didn't allow for a lot of reflection.) My H seems to be very happy with his "single" life, partying every night, and doing whatever he wants. He's spiritual but confused at this level too. He's confused about everything. Also, we don't have children, so there's no excuses to see each other once the D is final...
