We're not supposed to link on these forums, but if you Google "Retrouvaille" you'll find it easily.
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After MC this last week, I've come to understand that trust is the stumbling block here. I can forgive him, but I can't forget, and if I can't forget, how do I move forward in this relationship?
DR touches on this a bit, you should never expect to forget. Forgiving is NOT forgetting. You can forgive and remember. The trick is remembering without being bitter/ angry (because if you are, then you haven't truly forgiven).
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He is desperate to hold on to me and our family and says he has changed and will never lie to me again. He has not lied in a year to me.
Wow! That's pretty impressive! I would just say that H getting close to losing you may be the trigger that finally turned him around. When BD happened to me I changed and changed profoundly. I am not the person I was before BD. I do things much differently now. My W is like you I think, she doesn't trust my changes. She thinks I'll revert back to old ways. But I won't because I'm not just acting, I really did change. So much so that I wouldn't even know how to go back to the old me, in a very real sense that person died and I was born in his place. It could very well be the same for your H. You may never trust him like before, but that doesn't mean you can't have a meaningful R with him.
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I don't want to get burned again.
Give it more time. You seem worried that it's been a year and you're still feeling the lack of trust, but a year isn't really that long in the grand scheme of things.
