Hello! 20 year marriage teetering... (part II)

[Soul.Searching]

On the drive to work this morning I was thinking about the distance/ pursuit dynamic and how it has never applied to my sitch at all. Initially when W distanced I pursued and she distanced further. After finding DB I held my ground instead of pursuing and eventually distanced myself from her. She has never once pursued though

Are you sure about that? I think if you re-read your threads, you might think differently.

Without going back and re-reading myself, I can't give exact examples but Was there not points where she wanted to spend a lot of time at your house? Times where she called/texted more?

I believe the WAS peruses differently than us. They don't necessary actually presue a relationship. They just come much closer (EG spending more time, more calling, Little comments.)
then run back away.