You've learned the art of detaching. It takes a while to learn how to do that and ignore his spewing.

You are absolutely correct...you don't need to teach him how to grow up. He has to do that all by his lonesome self and it's going to take some time for that to sink in w/him. He does need to learn to respect you and that's where you will do so w/the boundaries that you set as time moves along.

This board was my lifeline many, many years ago. I know exactly how you feel.

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.