First, others will disagree, but I do NOT believe in exposure of affairs. At least not at the outset. Can discuss this more if it is ever confirmed that your W is in an A. Let's hope not.
Yep, I am a disagree-er . I asked H if he was seeing someone and he said no. He lied. It wasn't the sex, it was the lying. For me, that was perilously close to a deal breaker. Funnily enough, knowing the truth has made me position myself differently than before. Don't kid yourself, I was a wreck for a few days, but it gave me perspective.
That being said, I see Denver's point as well. If you are not in a position where you can handle the info at this point, don't do it. The exposure of an OW to me just confirmed what I suspected and I have no desire to know who where when or what.
The fact that H lied to me, put into question every single thing he has ever said because I trusted him, and it almost broke me. So, work towards your 180s GAL and detach, detach, detach.
Keep all info to yourself, do not ask W about OM, good chance she will deny. Do not let this eat you up SG..because it will if you let it
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