Do I Have a Chance?

[complicated]

Ok so today H text me saying when he moved out we agreed we could see others. I told him that what I said was that when you get to that point will you please give me the courtesy of telling me and he agreed. Of course he didn't. I didn't want to tell the kids Dad was going to start dating if it didn't happen. I didn't think it was wise to rock the boat if we didn't need to. Maybe that was wrong on my part.

Yesterday I tried calling him several times because I had no idea when he was coming back and he has put me in quite a bind, especially not knowing he was even leaving. I have had to scramble with D15 and other things I had going on.

He text me and said "I guess you were calling to yell at me like always and tell me you called your lawyer" He also reminded me of he could do anything he wanted and I didn't have any control over him.

I told him I had been leaving him alone and yes he can do whatever he wants and it was him that said "I left because you weren't paying any attention to me". What? You left me and our family because you wanted space now you want me to pay attention to you when you come over? How do I respond to that?

I also told him that I understood the need to get away but with another woman? I said didn't you think about how the kids would take it? Especially since there is some "history" with this woman. (She has sent multiple texts telling him she loves him in the past.) Our kids are very hurt.

When he said I'm sure you tried calling me to tell me you contacted your lawyer I said " I did not contact my lawyer. While I completely disagree with you going with another woman, especially her, I am trying to put the kids first. I said I am working on myself to be a better person for our marriage, our family and my relationships. I said initially I did it for you but now I'm doing it for myself. I got that line from someone else on here - haha.

I said some other things but that was the gist of it. While I am still very hurt and wanted to go off on him, I refrained. For me, that is a positive step.

If I hadn't been reading other's posts I would not have been able to refrain the little bit I have. I have a hot temper and I am really working on controlling it. And, I really do want to get it under control.