Wendy, Sometimes we have to take a break tor regroup. It won't take you long to find your own life....it's been right there in front of you the entire time...you just have to reach out and grab it and hold on for dear life.
Please take care of yourself and have a nice Thanksgiving.
Aloha!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Aloha to you too, Wendy. I hope you come back soon. I tried leaving the site often. I wouldn't post for a few weeks, then bam! I just needed to get advice on one thing or another, and I was back in. I've always been happy to be on the bb. I've never had bad advice.
Good luck. Hugs.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
This morning I woke up back on the rollercoaster. Saturday mornings were always special to me. After all week of him rushing off to work, I really enjoyed the sleep-in, snuggle, ML, snuggle, sleep more routine we had.
This morning I missed him so much. But what I miss is what I thought I had. I let him give me crumbs of affection for years. And watching him pursue OW now makes me laugh. The distancer/pursuer relationship will no doubt prove out. He will chase her 'til she catches him.
You wrote this for me, didn't you? Except for us it was Sunday mornings.... And while there's not on ow just now, I know H is trying to "reconnect" with W#2 ("So their son's wedding won't be 'awkward'" - in 2 years from now.) He has sent two emails, one apologizing "for ruining something that could have been great" and one to say, "did you get my email?" (Pursuing and distancing anyone?)
Originally Posted By: WenikiTiki
But I was living on that crumb of a Saturday. He was not giving me much for the past many years. Since 2000 for sure. So this morning I made a promise to myself that I don't know what is in my future, but it sure as heck must be something good and I won't settle for less.
I was feasting on a crumb as well. That's what I have realized since the BD.
Here's hoping to join you at a real banquet in that future you speak of.
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
This morning I woke up back on the rollercoaster. Saturday mornings were always special to me. After all week of him rushing off to work, I really enjoyed the sleep-in, snuggle, ML, snuggle, sleep more routine we had.
This morning I missed him so much. But what I miss is what I thought I had. I let him give me crumbs of affection for years. And watching him pursue OW now makes me laugh. The distancer/pursuer relationship will no doubt prove out. He will chase her 'til she catches him.
So many of my friends have told me how much in love with me X was. How he bragged about my accomplishments. But in retrospect I think he was threatned by all that is me. Outgoing, no-fear, get things done me. One of the things he said was that he felt like he didn't have his individuality.
Which is funny, because I always jumped in to get on board with all his plans. I thought that was what he wanted. Silly me.
But I was living on that crumb of a Saturday. He was not giving me much for the past many years. Since 2000 for sure. So this morning I made a promise to myself that I don't know what is in my future, but it sure as heck must be something good and I won't settle for less.
So as I was laying in bed, pondering being so alone, I decided to take back my Saturday Morning. I jumped out of bed, took care of the dogs, cleaned and organized for a bit, then grabbed my computer. And in my in-box was a delightful message from some guy from a dating site. Not sure if it would/could go anywhere. But YES, I am listening to the universe talk to me. Plenty of ham sandwiches to go around.
Heck, it isn't even 8:30 yet. Who knows where this day will lead?
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
Alright, my computer is screwing up. I had a nice response to the above all typed out and it >poofed<.
The gist of it was, ty for posting this, it spoke to me.... except it was Sunday mornings.... and while there isn't an ow that I know of, I do know H is trying to "reconnect" with W#2 - full pursuit there.
glad for your optimism and forward look to the future
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
Use all of my thread you want. They are nice around here, they let us make more!
Just checking in on my friends and saw you posted. My future continues to look bright. I am reading "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance". Making me think about thinking....
I just got to a part where he is explaining thinking resulting in positive growth vs. thinking resulting in lateral growth. And it made me realize I do a lot of lateral thinking. I am going to try and curb that!
I hope everyone is keeping their heads above water as we approach Christmas!
Aloha,
Wendy
Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32 D final 9/12 Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
sorry to take up so much of your thread.... slinking off to corner...