TheUF - Changing gears - Dropping the rope?

[theUF]

This is only needed when you are not detached.

When you hit that detachment level you will be confident in replying.

Detached ,confident and in control.

Right on!

For now I need time to reflect on certain matters, b/c I'm not at THAT point in detachment, and I don't think she is either. This makes for hard comms between us.
And that is why I need to grasp what you are telling me, about detaching, about not getting in to R/OR talks etc.

We have shared lots, and grew into adults together. No matter what happens, we have shared so many experiences and so much love. I know deep down I want her to be happy, it's my feelings, grief and ego standing in the way.

She's checked out. I know myself how easy it is to distance yourself in hard times when you have a understanding friend(of opposite sex) in your life.

I need to make time and space my friend. Work on myself and focus on what will make MY life better. Usually I'm the kind of guy who goes all in to achieve my goals, I need this guy back.
Before I learn to detach I can not be happy for either of us.

Thanks for you insights CB, I really appreciate every time you chime in. Although I clearly have a hard time putting all the advice/principals into action, at least I know what to work on.