MLC, affair, internet pictures, we're a mess

[cantslowdown]

So how do you detach? When I say this I think its a detachment of the anger I feel towards what shes done and how I react when provoked with all this pent up crap. When we argue I am not a screamer, but I have a LOUD voice so making passionate points comes across as me hollering or shouting her down (I think). She said if I do that again she will walk out of therapy and never go back. I understand that. I said that I don't like that about myself and I was hoping the communication expert (the counselor) could help me. It will help me in all kinds of misunderstandings because I get going and can't stop. I am like a lawyer at the end of A Few Good Men shouting out the facts.

Anyway, I have to detach and head myself off at the pass when I am going for one of these situations. Especially if it gets to her misleading the counselor and I have to control my gut reaction to set the record straight.

When I got home she said she doesn't see why she should go back because it didn't work (today, our one and only get to know how f'd up we are session). I just said if she wanted to be able to tell everyone she tried counseling before she decided to leave, then she needs to TRY counseling. I am not letting her off the hook. I may not be able to get her to stop seeing him and concentrate on us, but I sure as heck am not going to put up with the lies and half-cracked communication styles we have if she chooses to remain in this house.