Go dark as you can. Seriously, right now. Can you take off with kids somewhere for a couple days? Is it financially doable even a road trip? No gun, please no gun.
Do not reply to him, do not engage him, document everything.
Go running, throw stuff ( not in front of kids lol) cry, and repeat until a semblance of sanity or exhaustion is reached. You will be thinking clearer at this point. Keep coming here and venting. We will listen, we support you. DB or not, this is not a good place for you to be in.
