Hi Kimmerz. I too have felt "done" many times only to find that, wait, there's more. What I noticed later is that I'm done being done. That happened at some point along the way, but I think it was about the time I unloaded the remainder of what I had to say. I knew it didn't matter to her what I had to say, but realized it was for me, important to letting go the remainder of the way.
What contributes to taking longer is the "interference" from my ex. Being aware of that helped a tremendously. The holidays are the hardest because she seems to have more to say during those times. But realizing that, I have been more able to distance and set boundaries.
Even now, (she is remarried) she still seems to try and come up with things against me. It changes over time as if she is trying really hard to still come up with a reason. I view this as her still dealing with her demons. I wish her well, but I keep those boundaries. I accepted a long time ago that this will go on for as long as I let it and then a little longer
One thing to be aware of when you do start dating would be that you'll have feelings come up that you'll need to deal with. Don't be afraid or hesitant to deal with them. Certain situations will trigger those feelings, but you have the tools and distance to deal with them now. Be confident in yourself.
Don't be desperate to follow those dreams. Be confident and steadfast. Set your sights and go after those dreams. It'll come. You'll be glad you did.
There's still more to learn and do and explore, Kimmerz. There's an awesome world out there, ready and waiting for you. Time is short but you have the tools and experience to really do great things. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise because you were made for greatness.
And always remember there will be more. No matter what comes at you though, you'll be able to deal with it with grace. That's a gift to your daughters that nobody else on the planet can give but you.
Responsibility? You have them, but they are not a huge burden if you change your perspective. They are an opportunity for you to shine.
You're awesome Kimmerz. You've come a long way and you'll go much further. Looking forward to hearing about it in the future...
Peace, AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
