What I don't get is that he feels that we're "separated" yet we continue to do family things and ML and spend time together talking. He said that he was doing these family things out of convenience, not because he "feels" it. I guess I have to take issue with that because I still maintain that if he really wanted to be separated, he'd move out. And he hasn't done that yet. I sense that he's more confused, and at a deeper level than he realizes.
Hi LA, I know this is frustrating and disappointing. I've been going through the same things with my H. Even after I've given him the names of mediators and have been looking for houses, we ML. My H has still made no moves and I only saw a list of 2 houses.
It sounds like your H is very confused but also has some deep seated issues and is not ready to forgive or has an issue with forgiveness as a whole from what you've described. It also sounds like he is throwing new things out because you've worked on the first issue. You may have to ask yourself how much of that you can go through?
My H also will not recognize that marriages go through dips. He also won't recognize that spouses fight and do not always see eye to eye. It is hard to compete with an unrealistic view of the world.
Start to shift your focus back to you and your boys before you wear yourself out trying to please your H. He doesn't sound like he can be pleased right now.
M44 H57 D17 (special needs) M 18 yrs Bomb 7/2/12 Still living together
