After writing all this down. I think the thing that really bugs me about H right now is the vagueness.

He's always so vague when he is trying to take advantage of me and get away with something. He leaves big chunks of the truth out. In the past, I would pretend or believe what he was telling me was the whole truth although I would have a feeling he was pulling something over me.

Want to believe, but... He's doing it again. I can feel it. He does some good deeds and is congratulating himself and giving himself permission to be a d-bag again. Maybe?

Ever since he made that remark about me giving him permission about having sex with OW, I've wanted to speak up for myself. I think I need to. A 180 for me, in this situation, would be to not trust a single thing he says or does and keep him at a distance.

I went from that conversation about sex with OW to trying to be there for him when he was sick. I keep remembering how I'm supposed to be kind and supportive though because of the MLC pain he is in. But, don't want to be a doormat.

Clueless.

"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson