When I got home from work I asked her if we could talk because something was bothering me and I needed to tell her. She looked ready for a fight. I told her I was sorry for my attitude and comments at the end of last week. I told her I've been under a lot of stress with divorce, work, and extra holiday stuff I get roped into and I regretfully took it out on her. I didn't say anything else. She seemed responsive and her eyes softened a little and we actually talked for a couple minutes (just small talk that she started). I followed it up by asking her if she wanted to join the kids and I for Thanksgiving, she accepted. She tried to hide it but I could see she was happy to not have to spend holiday alone. Later in the night she came up to me and said maybe we could also all go to the parade or a movie. We watched TV as a family for first time in weeks. She even included me in her prayer that we do with kids before bed every night.
I'm not sure if these were the correct 'DB' things to do but I needed to do it for me because it was what I wanted to do and made me feel better because I was feeling bad about my attitude last week. I didn't come across as needy or even elude that I cared either way (even though I did). I'm getting so much advice that my head is spinning. Pass or fail, I'm realizing I have to do what's in my heart or everything feels off and doing it for wrong reasons (i.e. making someone spend holiday alone or being an a$$ to help me detach is just not who I am anymore).
Personality is who the world sees, character is who you are
