when do I start piecing ?

[MrBond]

"but as far a "they are only protecting their daughter" you are wrong there"

Nope. What you call "enabling", they are seeing it as being responsible parents. You may not agree, however, they are their children and that's how they see it. So you must respect it as much as you would like them to respect your decisions.

The more you try to see things "your way" the less successful you will be in this process. If, however, you learn how to start seeing things through other people's POV, then you'll be able to get rid of resentment and possibly save your M.