Thank you all for the advices. This friend doesn't view the whole thing from my part and I really don't blame him. So, I basically stopped telling him more of how I feel and all that. He can do whatever he wants, I won't hold grudges against him.
I've been down for a few days now, I still haven't forgiven myself yet. I just keep thinking I contributed way too much negatives into our M. I'm scared that I would feel this way the rest of my life...
Heard that H plans to visit me in a few weeks. I want to think that he just wants to see me but I'm more convinced to think that he is coming to finally tell me he wants out. And I know i do not want that. How do I deal with this when he actually shows up with a distant face and cold tone? Last time, I cried and told him all I wanted was a warm caring family... I know I won't be saying that this time, but really, how could I show him even a tiny chance that we would work? Anyone experienced with this before and how did it go? Just hearing about the fact that he is coming over sometime to talk makes me so emotional right now.
