A question for those who were WAS. Those of you who were treated bad in your M and have Reconciled was it one specific thing that triggered you to reconcile with your S or was it consistent time + changes in your S that madebyou want to reconcile?
it's consistent change + sufficient time = change the WAS can believe in.
YOU came here a year ago but did NOT DB...why?
You were complacent, again...and so NOW you say you are DBing but I don't know what the 180s are in you.
You are not spending as much money? B/c that is about being a good provider and most women see "Security" as one of the 2 most important traits in their husbands...and
that means physical security (so NO physical abuse or intimidation)
AND Financial...no worries that the home will be foreclosed or the kids needs won't be met, etc...
and fwiw, the other trait is fidelity.
Your wife has reason to doubt yours...or at least she did.
She told you that she was, in effect, lonely IN the marriage...I'd say
Don't give up so easily. It's not the time you've been here but the time YOU have put into DBing
and from what I've read, it's not much change on your end that is visible or significant.
No offense, but what is different about you?
your wife will ONLY want to be married to you under ONE condition...which is that marriage to you now would be better/different than before.
So, how are YOU SHOWING her that it would be better or different?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
