I hear you on the disipline thing.Is s(9) angry with W and trying to punish her? I was the same way..I am Italian so my yelling does not mean much it is how we talk...it scares mid westerners though!...they listen and respect me...W has a hard time with them and lots of yelling now....D(11) is failing classes though and W response is well she will just have to take 5th grade over! I think the WAS loses a lot of respect from the kids when they make this move...it is hard to teach "responsibility" when you yourself are walking away from your responsibilities! I think W is reacting to mini BD! lol...but don't get too cocky... she could be doing the Charlie Brown thing waiting for you to want to kick the football...and then pull it away
