He's Just Not That Into You

[Wendylon]

I do need to get better at dropping the rope - he is continually doing this suspicious sh!t and it makes me bananas. Just now, he stopped what he was doing and said, "I'm going out to get some cash." Again, he never does this. He was back very quickly but I'm sure he was making some phone call or something along the way. I did say to him "what are you really doing?" but regretted that and tried to remember to drop the rope.

Now that could be my H! He comes up with the weirdest reasons to go off and do something. It drives me absolutely bananas too but less so since visiting this board. I still hate the way he never lets me see what's on his screen. I used to catch him out or question him but I've let go of doing that. While it was really hard work at first, it feels easier now. I don't care as much. It's great that you realised (even though it was after) that asking him what he was really doing wasn't productive.

I agree that it makes sense for you to go to his dad's house the day after Thanksgiving if you can.

I know that when my H tried to leave 8 years ago, he wavered when he would see me and the kids getting on well and he worried that they wouldn't be as happy with him if I wasn't in the picture. He also told me once that one of his greatest pleasures was watching me with S13. S13 is very affectionate with me in a way he isn't with anyone else. H knew he'd miss out on witnessing that if he left for OW. It was pretty much guaranteed that S13 was not going to be affectionate with OW. All this to say that I'm sure your H won't be indifferent to seeing his family together happily.