About your boundary, it's not a boundary and really can't be. It's what you would like but you can't enforce it, there are no consequences. I'm not saying this to beat you up but rather something to think about as you learn to set boundaries.
A boundary must be enforceable: "I feel disrespected when you yell at me. If that continues I will leave the room."
Without court-ordered visitation, there is no consequence to him just showing up to see the kids. It would be dangerous, both legally and physically, to say "Sorry, you can't see them right now."
That's what the courts are for.
So be careful.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
