Put your hands up; it's a wild ride

[someguy1233]

I didn't ask her to skip the happy hour. She made the decision on her own. If she had asked, I would have watched S.

Ok then the next time something like this comes up why don't you try being clear with her. Take the lead and offer to watch your S but monitor what she does i.e. don't let her take advantage of the situation. IMHO if she had gone to happy hour even though you were tired and need sleep the next time a happy hour comes and you need sleep she should stay home. There should be some type of balance there. Come up some type of compromise.

I did that on Monday night. She asked if it would be ok if she went to a happy hour. I said yes and watched S. She said she'd come home and make a late dinner for her and I. Except she didn't come home until 10PM and never called.

After that experience just two days ago, I felt no reason to offer to allow her to go out again when I'm exhausted from working late. Especially when it's a happy hour for the possible OM. At that point I just felt like I'd be enabling her to walk all over me.

I think you're right. She doesn't respect me when I'm sick/tired/etc. She thinks I'm a baby at those times. She feels like she has to pickup all the slack in those instances. Over the years I've tried to explain multiple times that I'll do all that I can, and whatever doesn't get done is fine... I'll take care of stuff when I'm feeling better. She doesn't agree and feels I should just power through.

Isn't that what marriage is all about? Sickness and in health etc. When your W is sick does she power through and get things done? I have to say that your W and my W sound exactly the same when it comes to getting things done and I think it's an issue they may need to talk to someone about but I bet that your W like mine is to stubborn to talk to someone. I know when my W gets sick I pick up the slack without complaining.

W powers through when she's sick. Whenever she's sick I try to get her to rest and tell her I'll take care of things. She's mentioned seeing an IC a few weeks back, but I haven't seen or heard or take any action on it.