On the way to the bank I bring up going Christmas shopping for the kids
You've really got to focus on your DB'ing and stop talking to her like you're a couple. Here are some reminders from the DB tips:
5. Do not encourage talk about the future. 12. Act as if you are moving on with your life. 13. Be cheerful, strong, outgoing and attractive. 14. Don't sit around waiting on your spouse - get busy, do things, go to church, go out with friends, etc. 17. You need to make your partner think that you have had an awakening and, as far as you are concerned, you are going to move on with your life, with or without your spouse. 18. Do not be nasty, angry or even cold - just pull back and wait to see if spouse notices and, more important, realize what she will be missing 19. No matter what you are feeling TODAY, only show your spouse happiness and contentment. Show her someone she would want to be around. 27. Take care of yourself (exercise, sleep, laugh & focus on all the other parts of your life that are not in turmoil). 28. Be strong and confident and learn to speak softly. 29. Know that if you can do 180, your smallest CONSISTENT actions will be noticed much more than any words you can say or write. 30. Do not be openly desperate or needy even when you are hurting more than ever and are desperate and needy.
You keep engaging in all these talks that imply you're still a couple, but you've to quit thinking in those terms. You may be under the same roof, but recent events have driven you really far apart and you're no longer a couple. If you want to get that back then you've got to follow DB'ing principals, especially the above tips. Show only happiness and contentment. Don't talk about the future. Don't talk about the R. Act as if you're moving on with or without her. You're breaking all these rules. You don't seem to realize you're being needy, clingy and you are applying all kinds of pressure to her. None of that is attractive.
