Quote: why can't HE see that he cares for me? that he calls me with these little things? why can't it sink into his THICK skull???
WHY WHY WHY
This seems to be THE question for all of us, kitti.
I wonder if THEY were so hurt during all of this, plus the fact that THEY can't understand WHY they did what they did, that THEY are scared to death to recommit. After all, what if it happens again? Then will they have to go through ALL of this stuff again? Maybe they think it is easier to sit on the sidelines than to get in the game?
WHY WHY WHY does it take a MAN so long to muster up enough courage to live the life he can live?
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
holdingon - yeah, i think one of my hubby's greatest fears is that it will happen again. oh well, i can't force him any faster thru his issues, so i just have to sit and wait by the side lines...
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POSITIVES
1) went to breakfast with the inlaws, left my phone purposely in the car in case hubby tried to call, just didn't wanna be too accessible - when got back from eating breakky, no phone call...then went to visit another relative and again purposely left the phone in the car...we were only there for 30 minutes
hubby calls on bil's phone looking for me, so i say, we are leaving, i will just call him from the car - so when i get into the car i see that he tried to call three times. when i get him he wants to know where i am and what i am doing and that he has been trying to call ALL MORNING!!! LOL - um, yeah...so we talk a few minutes...hehe
2) had a fantastic time with the inlaws this weekend. they are SUCH good people, and they love me to death, and they all could just CREAM my husband for what he is doing - i got to share some information with my fil on midlife crisis and the 5 love languages - that was fun talking to someone in real life what i do here
3) i finally called him around 8:30 last night (he was gonna call at 9) because i was just too tired to keep my eyes open, he sounded pleased that i called...
Sounds lke you have some good positives going on here..
Honesty, sincerity, tenderness and trust. A little less time for the rest of the world, And more for the two of us. Kisses each mornin, I love yous at night, Just like it used to be.
thank you kevin...i try to focus on the positives, it seems to help me a great deal
POSITIVES
1) when i mentioned yesterday that hubby had tried to call me "all morning" on saturday, i forgot to add that he completely forgot what he called for...well he called me on my way home from augusta yesterday to tell me he remembered...
i have this red blanket that i have had since i was 11 years old, something i always have with me no matter where i go, my own "security blanket" and he called to ask me how i was surviving without it since i didn't take it with me...
i thought that was a bit funny...
2) exwife and hubby had some words last night about visitation (boys have had band stuff to do this last scheduled visit and the one coming up) - they were on the phone for about 15 minutes, and he came back angry...
"more of the same" would have been for me to tell him how he should have handled her, but i just let him talk and validated everything he said. it seemed that he didn't wanna stop talking about it, so i just continued to listen
3) ok, marathon movie watching has begun again, we watched THREE movies yesterday!!!
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just journaling
will be taking off to california next week tuesday, actually i have to take a train to jacksonville and then the plane to sac
ugh...
i am facing LOTS of demons going to ca this time, it's getting into my dreams again
had a dream last night about ex-husband. he had called and asked if i wanted to have coffee with him, and i said sure, and so he told me to meet him at this little lake side restaurant...
i met him there but he said, oh this is not where we are going to have our coffee and he put me on this self rowing boat with him and we went thru this really scary amazon type river thing to this resort area that looked like it was in hawaii or something
when we got there - it was this fancy pancy place that everyone knew him by name and there was this HUGE pool and we sat there and drank coffee, then he tells me he owns the place
I will miss you while you are gone, but, know I will be thinking of you.
Dreams~those little buggers, sometimes if they are good they can help us to get through some rough times, but on the other side they can leave us worried and upset. Know they are "just" dreams or nightmares in your case.
I think you are just a little sceptical about leaving. Call home everyday, it will help and it will make you feel connected.
you folks know i have been spending a lot of time with the motivational speaker Brian Tracy lately
well in listening to one of his tapes the other day for the upteenth time, i thought i would type out the information and send it to my db buddies, cause i felt it was so important to share
the information is about the law of cause and effect. interesting to say the least
