The crack in my separated life...

[greatwhitenorth]

Sweetbriar, your husband is behaving like a child. Let him wallow in it and don't take his crap on.

My sense is he was looking for three things from your D, and none of them is advice.
1. Pity: "oh daddy you're in such a hard spot"
2. Worship: "...but you're doing all this anyway. You're my hero!"
3. Free pass: "we'll be fine. You to do what makes you happy."

Until he grows up he will continue to think in this self-absorbed way. If it were me I would tell him in no uncertain terms that he is not to talk to my children in a way that makes them feel bad, that includes self-piteous moaning. But I'm all about drawing hard lines.