what question was that what i am doing to get a life? I am going to the gym with friends working part time for my aunt, spending time with family and friends applying for jobs and starting a tank top line for side money with my friend.
I am trying to stay busy as i can on my budget
m: 32 H:33 T:7 M:4
7/12 says he might want out 8/12 find out about ow he wants a D 9/12 he says he loves me not here wants me back 9/12 he pull away 11/12 still separated
i am trying to be more independent and start my own business for my own self esteem i think it is the only chance I have of working my marriage out as well.
m: 32 H:33 T:7 M:4
7/12 says he might want out 8/12 find out about ow he wants a D 9/12 he says he loves me not here wants me back 9/12 he pull away 11/12 still separated
does anyone feel or is this just my situation that the walk away partner doesn't really talk with them about what is going on.
One moment he says i want to work on it lets take a trip for the holidays the next he is talking about going to visit his friend for the holidays without even mentioning that we had talked about doing something else.
is this something i am suppose to be calling him out on or is it being clingy? I don't know.
I don't know how much i am suppose to take and what i am suppose to yell or point out to him.
m: 32 H:33 T:7 M:4
7/12 says he might want out 8/12 find out about ow he wants a D 9/12 he says he loves me not here wants me back 9/12 he pull away 11/12 still separated
my husband went from seeming like he wanted to reconcile to feeling to me know answer from him like he is done. i said above that he changed his Facebook status to single now i know why it pop across my screen that he is friend with some new young girl.
which is the first friend i have seen him accept in over 2 years he never goes on there so this was all for her.
i miss him so much don't get how he can be over things when this is the first rough patch we have ever had and it has not even been a year since trouble started.
We had talked about a trip for the holidays but when i talked to him the other day he was talking about ohio to see his mom or going to california and doing a road trip to see all our friends and his family there. it hurts because i do't know california is our thing.
I am so jealous of all of your whose husband seemed to want to work on it for a while i feel like he was just like i am done and gone after i went to see him.
we were so close there it is like it freaked him out or something.
i just keep praying god will open his heart to our marriage. I know he still loves me on some level
m: 32 H:33 T:7 M:4
7/12 says he might want out 8/12 find out about ow he wants a D 9/12 he says he loves me not here wants me back 9/12 he pull away 11/12 still separated
Okay the therapist today kept talking like i should move on because its been a rough few weeks but i feel like its only been 2 weeks of weirdness where things were going so well until then.
do you guys think i should give up hope?
m: 32 H:33 T:7 M:4
7/12 says he might want out 8/12 find out about ow he wants a D 9/12 he says he loves me not here wants me back 9/12 he pull away 11/12 still separated
another thing and I think I am right in this she keeps asking me why i am not forcing him to file yet and i am like because i am not ready for that. it has only been two months I don't think it is something i need to rush.
i get it h seems selfish right now but it has only been a bad year we have been happy otherwise.
i am not going to be the one to rush this . Am I right?
m: 32 H:33 T:7 M:4
7/12 says he might want out 8/12 find out about ow he wants a D 9/12 he says he loves me not here wants me back 9/12 he pull away 11/12 still separated
another thing and I think I am right in this she keeps asking me why i am not forcing him to file yet and i am like because i am not ready for that. it has only been two months I don't think it is something i need to rush.
You've got to decide whether you want to DB or whether you want to go to this IC. Because the two are incompatible. Clearly your therapist is not marriage-focused. If you want to DB then dump the therapist.
Quote:
i am not going to be the one to rush this . Am I right?
If you are DBing, then you don't ever initiate any M talks at all. If H brings it up then listen and validate. But you don't bring it up, and you definitely don't "rush" it unless D is what you want.
Either change therapist or ask that she/he reads DB. The IC is there for you. They will say things to help you feel better because you are their client. have you said that you want to save the M?
M 53 D 20 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”
