Actually I have two fantastic friends, who have walked the MLC walk with me, both of whose rather prominent and successful husbands had affairs [wholly out of character in each case], but decided to fix their marriages. 10 years down the line those marriages are rock solid, but the husband of one of the women said the first year was the hardest time of his life - the OW was like a drug he wanted to go bac to, but resisted. He said a part of him didn't want to do the work, although another part of him really wanted it.
There are happy endings if the guys are prepared to work on the marriage and be honest about what went wrong . . . and the wives are prepared to listen
