This is a bit of a longer post as I journal the weekend. Overall, I think it was a good weekend. She didn't text as much. Her phone is still kept upside down with a passcode on it.
The non-retro weekend This was the weekend we were supposed to go to Retrouvaille, but W changed her mind. Friday and Saturday she went to yoga. I guess this is better than her going out drinking!
She snuggled me in bed Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights.
-Saturday- I put on my best jeans and a nice shirt. W asked why I was so dressed up. She said I was wearing “date clothes” and jokingly asked if I had a date. Then she said, “speaking of that, should we go out tonight?” I agreed and we went out for dinner and a bottle of wine.
During dinner she said, “See we can have fun!” She commented that she was talking with one of her friends and telling her about how great I am. Her friend said that I sounded amazing and she didn’t understand what the problem is.
W asked if I was disappointed that we weren’t at Retrouvaille. She said she's just not in the right frame of mind to go. Said her head needs to be in the right place and that both people should want to go. She said if it were THAT night (Saturday) Into Sunday she’d go now. But she couldn't go from work on Friday to retro and not see S. She also said it was too stressful with having to do laundry, make food for week, etc. The she said, “but see! We’re still having fun, right?!”
She brought up more sex life related talk. This has been happening more frequently. I really think that if we reconcile a lot of focus needs to be put in this area. It’s becoming clear to me that she must not have been satisfied. (We haven’t been close since bomb-day, so I can’t really work on this now).
She played a song in the car about being “difficult to love.” She said it reminded her of herself and how she’s hard to love. Then she said it was too serious and quickly changed it. She said she must be hard to be married to.
-Sunday- We needed diapers for S. I said I’ll run to the store. She said, “No. Let’s go to the store and hang out as a family.” We had fun. W touched my back multiple times as I pushed the cart. She allowed her hand to stay on my back. It was more than just a casual brush.
She gave me a long hug after dinner.
She made another comment about me being the best dad as we put S to bed.
Before going to bed she said, “this weekend was exactly what I wanted it to be.” She snuggled me again.
Other notes… She made another comment about where she could work part time if she stayed home with S. (planning for the future) She talked about how we could put an addition on the house if we’re “rich someday.” (more planning for the future?)
Monday morning She came into the bathroom while I was in the shower. She hasn’t done this since bomb-day. She walked around in her underwear. She hasn’t let me see her without clothes since bomb-day. She even asked me to fix the straps on her bra. I told her it was a good look for her. She laughed and did a silly dance.
Once dressed, she asked me if she looked ok. I stopped what I was doing, looked at her and said, "Wow! You look amazing!" She sheepishly smiled and said "I don't even know how to respond to that." She jokingly showed her stocking under the dress.
M34 W35 S5 S2 T10 M6 on/off over the years including her A Recently- Nov 2015 bomb Nov 2015-Feb 2016 Reconciling Feb bomb March-April Reconciling May - bomb Mid-May I tell her I'm done
