When the tough love technique does draw them back, is it because they really want back in on their own accord?
My guess is no, it's more likely they came back because you cornered them, out played them in the chess game, so to speak.
In my experience of posting on this and other forums, this is not what the formerly wayward spouses -- particularly formerly wayward wives -- report as why this approach worked (when it did work). I like many parts of Dobson's approach and dislike some others, but I think it would be unfair to characterize the many thousands of successes that he's had as being simply "because you cornered them," just as it would be unfair to say that MWD's approach works simply because "you waited them out, while not doing anything to p*ss them off."
Just my opinion. I personally think there is much value in the best stuff out there, by MWD, Dobson, Penny Tupy, Janis Spring, Dr. Harley, Shirley Glass, Phil McGraw and others. But most of my advice (as with many of us) simply comes from my own experience of what worked for ME, coupled with my observations of what I've seen work BEST for others, in the MAJORITY of situations (since there is no one approach that's guaranteed to work for ANYONE). Ultimately, as Michele herself says, we should "do what works."
