Unpacking my bags

[needgrace]

hi ruby, thanks for stopping by.. for me, i think the texting and contact enables me to keep checking her temperature and keeps me focused on her instead of me.

ss, how big a role do you think fear plays in your feelings about R? i ask bc i tried to put myself in your shoes and felt a lot of fear.. for me, trusting W again would be hard.

kg, i do feel better but there are ups and downs still.. i do think it is easier without kids, there are not the constant contacts...and you are still in the midst of the financial settlement which i found very very difficult too.

sd, honestly, i am sad today. i spent yesterday with some friends who have the sweetest little girl, she is almost 2. she latched on to me and we spent most of the day playing, swinging and reading books while her moms entertained another couple. it was a beautiful day and i loved every minute..

but it was a reminder of the times W tried to get pregnant years ago... and that has made me sad this morning.. that plus just missing having someone to wake up with and spend a lazy sunday with... i have allowed myself to have my tears but i still feel heavy.. when a M ends there is just so much to grieve.

i am planning to see a friend later and get out so that i can get a change of scenery..

love and peace to all today