The ow serves as a bandaid to his pain and suffering. She is there to support him, validate and provide affirmation while he's going through this. She provides the fun and thrills of crisis for him in ways that we can't. Generally she is a weaker individual, the opposite of us. She is there to look up to him, stroke his ego and yes, she doesn't know him the way we do. Mlcers generally affair down, so the ow will not be of the same moral class that we are.
BTW, she will not know about all of his life like we do. We would "expect" him to act a certain way and live his life the way that he use to. The ow, doesn't care how he was and she does not "expect" him to act pre-crisis. All she cares about is that he is w/her, spending money and having a good time.
The mirror image of what he use to be, therefore the op will most likely be the exact opposite of what you are or what he would have been attracted to pre-crisis.
Keep the focus on you and your family.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
