I agree with AJM, completely...the shininess is wearing off and he peeking back out...but as AJ said, this is a tough, and delicate point.
You know reality, you know he can't trusted (yet), you have the power at this point, use it wisely with the long term in mind.
As far as letting him come over, maybe that is where you decide, for YOU, what you are comfortable with...the line between a smooth road home, and cake-eating, is very vague and not straight, and crosses over into the other's turf from time to time. Maybe have limited access, with a clear goal communicated for each visit (fix the sink, mow the grass, visit with kids, etc)...?
Since my mlc'er has been in-house the whole time, I have wore the badge of doormat, allowed some cake-eating, but slowly reduced those things up as my changes were shown to be real and not a tactic, as I have seen her "warm-up" to me, watched the OMs shininess fade, and as W has worked through her stages/issues/whatever...but boundaries must be determined by you and enforced, modified as needed...lots of trial and error and going with what "feels" right when calm and centered. Your mileage may vary depending on road conditions and driving style...;)
Btw, I appreciate your references to Monty Python...they are a favorite of mine...your H has a W who appreciates MP, that is rare in my experience, man, is just doesn't know...
T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
