I love your list Sweetbriar, good for you! Take a step back, read that over and celebrate it again! You're in a crazy tough situation but you are moving forward and living your life.

With H, you are rising above, you are taking the high road and that requires discipline. That's really really great that you didn't get into it with H. Beautiful.

I will say again I think you should cut off his texting -- it's too easy for him to spew at you without thinking. Make him work a little harder if he's going to be mean.

Another thing that can help: people's actions are driven by one of two emotions -- love or fear. If H is being mean and angry, it's because he is afraid. If you can shift your perspective to see that he's operating from a place of fear, it can make it easier not to take his meanness to heart. He is lashing out because he is scared. Those are his fears and you do not own them. They are his to deal with.

Accuray

Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced
M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11
Start Reconcile: 8/15/11
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced)
In a New Relationship: 3/2015