There are times when I just want to give up. This hurts so much. It is my life day after day. I'm tired of trying to be strong. The lawyer asked me how I was so strong. I started crying. How's that for strong??? I haven't seen my H in weeks. Haven't heard his voice. Even though he said relationship with OW is over, I just wonder if he plans to go back to her. I know I'm supposed to GAL and move on and don't think about what he's doing. But, you can't tell me than anyone on this forum can flip a switch and do all that. My H has walked out on his family and hides. Some days I feel like doing the same.
I could never leave my girls, they're not even little and in a year both of them won't be living at home. They will both be in college. I don't ever want them out of my life. They are the reason I keep going thru this unbearable life. I also deeply love my husband and have the fantasy that he will come back to me.
But, I'm not living a fantasy. I'm living in real life, real loneliness, real pain. Thanks for your advice. I really do appreciate it and value what you say. There are people that I've never met on this forum that care more about me than the man I've spent the last 28 years with.
