It's been a while mate, but in all seriousness CB's question is really valid.
I get why you would still want to protect your wife's feelings, because it is a natural reaction to protect the one's we love no matter what they have done to us.
In this case though by protecting her feelings here you are denying your W the opportunity to go through these feelings and emotions, in the hope that she would reflect upon her life choices, consequences to these choices and to ask herself what she truly wants out of life.
Through your wife's actions she has given you this gift to obtain this knowledge. The only way you can help your wife learn is to stop being her protector and to be what Denver sometimes refers to as a "lighthouse" for your wife.
Right now she might not see the lighthouse shining bright, but if her internal storms pass and she looks for guidance, she will see the lighthouse, she will see you.
Keep to your own path.
Bill
That's a great post from Bill. There is a difference between that lighthouse and being a crutch. You are the lighthouse by living your life well, by not giving up on the possibility of reconciliation, by being a good father... by loving your W from afar while letting her follow her own path without you.
I wasn't trying to slam you Arsene. I just think that if you can't tell someone, 'I don't know if you know, but my W and I are currently separated', then you are protecting her, and you are silently in denial of reality. You are trying to pretend that things are different than they really are. In fact, I see you doing this with your daughter in some ways. I'm just not sure how healthy it is for her, and you, to continue living your lives with the idea that your W will be coming home. It is what is right now. And you should always live life acknowledging what IS... IMO. Hopefully that 'IS" changes and you can begin living life with a new reality... but not yet.
If any of that makes sense...
It is hard Arsene. No one is saying that it isn't.
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
