I have actually pointed out to him many times that I find his walking away offensive, especially because I'm usually waiting for him to respond to what I just said and he just drops it and leaves. To be honest, though, our conversations go way too long and are rather unproductive, and it seems like there's never really an appropriate time to end it such that it ends on a positive note. So although I don't necessarily consider this to be a good long-term solution, I think it's a good one for now.
I have told him that I want a sexual R, but it has to be in a healthy context. I'm not a non-sexual person. But my having sex also means I expect to get something out of it too. He is a selfish partner. Period. So along with the emotional/relational sides of things that need to be addressed, I need to have some enthusiasm for the act itself with him. Right now, I don't. I have tried to address this with him over the years, but I struggle with how to tell my H he's not very good in bed without him interpreting it as me "pointing and laughing." And, of course, there's his inability to even remember what I suggested for 24 hours.
I'm sure this is not the appropriate forum for this, but people masturbate for a reason, most since the onset of puberty. It's not a replacement for the real thing, but it helps one get by. I suggested to my H that it's a natural and healthy thing and he might need to go that route for awhile until we reconciled our R, and he jumped down my throat. By his response, you would have thought I suggested to him that he use S12 instead.
I wasn't trying to be insulting to him or insensitive to his desire for sex. My suggestion of masturbation was in response to him telling me that the bible says that my body is his body, and I need to at least give him maintenance sex so that he can exercise his equipment and make sure it keeps working. It's hard to even feel human in that context, much less like it's act act of love. My empathy for his need is waning greatly.
The act of love is in the giving in it. Were not always going to want things the same time our relationship partner does, but as long as you don't detest them it shouldn't be a problem.
If your not going to be into it because your desire is low, tell H you will help him out, but he has to hurry.
Also if there is something that really bothers you, that makes it less likely for you to desire him, let him know somehow.
