GAL and work on yourself. Work with the children and get them into support classes to deal with this. Get with their teachers to monitor their marks and activities. Get with family to help you and your children. Become self-sufficient. Determine where you failed on repeating the same mistakes from before. Come to terms with that. Determine where the pattern started again with your H. Determine what you , your H and both of you could have done to break the cycle. Determine if it was going to happen anyways no matter what you did. Then forgive yourself. Then get ready to deal with the fall out of painting yourself as a weak person who allows people to walk over you. Your self-esteem is going to tumble downwards. So start now with finding a church or community that offers group support for Divorcing women and group support on boundaries and communication. Be very pro-active on your support group. So you can move through the numbness and come out the other side ready to catch up on those years you lost with yourself and your children. Then repeat the following expression. "It is not my fault. I am a good person. I am a good mother. I am a good wife. I am a good friend."
Work with H on an amicable division of material assets and co-parenting plan.
IF you decide to work on the R down the road. You will have the confidence in yourself and your choices.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
