Sunny, You will know when you've had enough, but I don't think you are there yet. The answers will come if you sit quietly and patiently.
Yes, you are angry and I don't blame you, but you've got to be the better person in all of this right now. Find things to keep you busy and away from her. She's pushing your buttons and I'm afraid that there will be a confrontation w/words that can never be taken back. She's like a child who continues to do things to get your attention/reaction, whether it is bad or good. Dig deeper for patience and ask God to help you get through this difficult bump in the road. He does not always give you want you want, but what you need, per the posting by hrm on her thread. Heck, you may not even like what he will provide in the way of an answer, but he's the only one that can provide you that strength and determination to move forward and on w/your life.
Take a deep breathe and this neighbor and your wife's flirting will pass. It has to die a natural death and I think that once she sees that it's not getting the reaction she was hoping for, she will stop it.
Good luck!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
