At this point, the divorce is to protect you financially and allow you to date without guilt.
It does NOT mean he can't come back, and although I'm not sure why you would consider him at this point either, remember that divorce is a piece of paper that does not prevent reconciliation.
Also, as far as the kids go - although I understand the temptation to want to reconcile for their sake - I think, when the cat is out of the bag already as it is, it's not necessarily a completely positive outcome for the kids anymore. I think, even with a successful reconciliation, the kids are always waiting for the other shoe to fall (which, eventually, unfortunately, it did in my case). So a decisive end may actually help them move forward too at this point.
And I agree with you - no way they're not suspicious about daddy's "friend". But if you don't make a big deal about it, odds are they won't either.
