My story - help please

[chatterbug]

It is the classic bait and trap OR talk.


Me: Goodbye, see you.
Her: Oh, ok.

Here you could have kept walking...

Me: ? Was there something else?
Her: Is there nothing you want to talk about?

Here you could have said. No. Have a good day.

Me: I thought that's what we did back there?
Her: Yeah. Ok. Can you drive me to my car? It's 5 min away
Me: Sure.
Couple min passes.
Her: Are you satisfied with the meeting and such?

Here you could have said. Under the circumstances yes. Thank you.
then silence.

Her: You're acting weird! You say you have plans all the time! And you talk about how we should handle new partners somewhere down the road.
Me: Yeah, I do. I'm letting you know I have plans. That's what I should do. And we should talk about these matters, to avoid any bitterness or fighting.

Here you could have said. No I was not talking about how to handle new partners. Silence.

Her: But you don't tell me any details about the plans!
Me: When I have S you mean?
Her: No whenever.
Me: You left me, you don't want me in your life. Why would I feel obligated to tell you all the details? I let you know if it is important though.

Here you could have said.

You and I are working on communicating and co-parenting. I think we are taking some great steps here. Lets continue to keep up the good work.

Her: It's like you have another woman! Is that the case?
Me: Why do you ask that? But no, it's not the case. Things are a mess now, I'm chosing to focus on me and S now. What about you? Do you have a new partner?
Her: No I don't.

Here you could have said.

I'm chosing to focus on me and S now. Then silence.



See so many ways to step out of a OR talk.


So why did you feel you had to bait her into an OR talk?