I think that this OM was less preditor than you make him out to be
sure
he started dating your wife...but she said your marriage was over
I am not saying these things to get you bent out of shape at your wife...I DO believe she is sorry for what she did and does want to make amends
I think that the OM is an ass but also was pretty betrayed by your wife and it [censored] pretty badly for him that his livlihood needs to be stripped away as well
it is too bad they both couldn't just be adult enough to work together or...if not, she should have left the company (in my opinion) and not put her boss in that situation.
if she can't handle working with him or you can't handle her working with him then it is time for her to leave
and
as someone who works with restraining orders etc....he is not at the restraining order point (just a heads up)
I know that I would feel great if the person my wife was having sex with fell on bad times.
Is it rational? No
Is it reasonable? No
Is it what's best? No
But is it human? He11 yes!!!
Trust me, I realize that I left this board cause it's what I needed to do for me to heal and get on with my life.
So I understand that commenting now is like complaining about who's president even if I didn't vote (Go Republican) lol...
I think you give yourself too much credit Harrier. You say that Denver should be able to keep his emotions in check with regard to the person he found naked with his wife. You say it as if you would keep your emotions in check and complete control.
And I know you couldn't...
Because you can't even keep your emotions in check on this board. Look how angry you are. And Denver isn't even your wife.
M: 42 - W: 41 - M: 18 - T: 23 - D:16 S:14 EA - July 2010 NC w/EA - Nov 2010 Piecing - Jan 2011 I ask for div - Jan 2012 Div papers filed - Mar 2012 I move out - July 2012 Divorce final - Nov 7, 2012
Actually Denver DB'd very well. He left his W alone, GAL and went with the LRT. The proof is in the result. He got his W back. I'm assuming he's getting some time in the sack and his W has been very mindful about what his feelings are.
Not bad I say.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
I think that this OM was less preditor than you make him out to be
sure
he started dating your wife...but she said your marriage was over
I am not saying these things to get you bent out of shape at your wife...I DO believe she is sorry for what she did and does want to make amends
I think that the OM is an ass but also was pretty betrayed by your wife and it [censored] pretty badly for him that his livlihood needs to be stripped away as well
it is too bad they both couldn't just be adult enough to work together or...if not, she should have left the company (in my opinion) and not put her boss in that situation.
if she can't handle working with him or you can't handle her working with him then it is time for her to leave
and
as someone who works with restraining orders etc....he is not at the restraining order point (just a heads up)
much love to you Denver
Unless we're going to do it off of this board, I'm done quibbling with you Harrier. It is a waste of my time. Good luck man.
----
Thanks Fig. I get what you are saying. Though I still don't agree 100%. For the record, my W was willing to continue to play with him as long as I was okay with it. I am not. She went to the owner of the company and left it up to him what he wanted to do. My W and I were, and are, both okay with it if she ends up having to leave the company. The owner of the company doesn't want her to leave. That's his choice. I realize it is at the detriment of the OM. And that is where I simply don't feel any sympathy.
As for the restraining order... yeah, I work with them too with my job. I know that we are not there yet. It was merely brought up as a possibility if it continues or gets worse. I agree that we are not there yet.
Most of this conversation is much ado about nothing. I was just updating things and made a comment that wasn't really meant to cause a firestorm. It has been talked about MUCH more here on the board than it has been here at home.
----
Eric and Bond -
I agree with you Eric that I should try to stay out of it. And I have. Like I said, when my W tells me about what is going on, I mostly just listen. She is handling it well IMO.
But I agree with Bond that there is always the danger that someone like OM can become obsessive and even dangerous. It really doesn't matter who it is, if he begins to pose any kind of threat, or it gets to the point where my W feels harassed, I will do what I need to. That fact really has nothing to do with it being OM or not.
----
SBH - Go Dems!
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
I'm not gonna speak for anyone here, yet I will say this...
Throughout your entire ordeal, you admitted that this in some way, was about "winning" with the whole sitch....
When you started just living your life, and quit worrying about winning or losing, things turned around for you first, and eventually for your marriage...
And I think that you should keep that in mind when you enjoy the demise of the Tidy Bowl Man....
Just make sure that it isn't about winning now...
There are more important things to worry about.
What are you going to do today, out of what is normal life, to SHOW her that she is special to you ??
I don't know...I guess I never would have put it into a situation where my boss had to chose because I would have made the choice for them
That is what being an adult means
I made the bad decision by having an affair with a co-worker and now my spouse doesn't feel comfortable with me working with them so the decision rests with me to leave