Get everything lined up. Do the upfront work on the legal work. Co-parenting plan.
Then take a 2 week vacation from everything. Everything. Then come back.
Then state what your going to do.
This is the 3rd time for you. So this time lead with what you want so that you will be living in a healthy environment.
You can just state simply.
"H. Knowing our history. Knowing that you have poor boundaries with the opposite sex. Knowing that you will openly lie to your family. Knowing that you will brush off my concerns. I have decided that I will no longer be in a marriage full of deceit and lies."
Pause.
"H. I only want to be married to a man who is open, honest and truthful with me and the children. Since you have shown with your actions that you are not capable of this, I am ending this."
Pause.
"I have seeked legal council due to our financial situation and for child support and visitation. Here is the card of my lawyer. Have your lawyer contact them."
"Tomorrow we can sit the children down and explain to them the truth about why our marriage is breaking up and both offer them love and support going forward during these tough times."
"I have a few more items we need to go over but this is enough for today. Lets do this in a civil manor and as quickly as possible."
That would be a leading way to push through this.
People always say they will remain in a marriage for the sake of the children.
But this teaches the children that it is ok to live in a dysfunctional home where both parents live in a lie. Many children become resentful of this environment. It also teaches the cheating spouse that they can do what ever they want with no repercussions. The D card is to protect you and your children from this dysfunctional environment.
They are old enough to be explained the truth and taught some valuable life lessons on boundaries and being truthful and open in a marriage.
Guess what I am getting at is that do not lie or cover up your H's selfish choices that have been consistent throughout your marriage. This is who he is. Better to get this over with now and not have to go through with it again in another 5 to 10 years when he plays the MLC card or some other excuse.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
