Trying not to lose my way in the ultramarathon

[jbnati]

Well, anytime my W and I have been together and we've had a somewhat decent interaction, there is almost always a pull back. It looks like my W had at least one more in her. She texted me early on Saturday evening saying we hadn't talked about the dissolution for some time now, and that she thought when I hired a L, that things would start moving along. She said she has contacted her L and that allegedly my L is not responding. My understanding was we have been waiting on her for 6+ weeks. I let her know what I've heard from my L. I just left it with her I would call my L today.

I also found out from my S that the OM and his S spent the entire weekend over my W's house. I'm just angry for my S. TBH, though, knowing that makes it a lot easier to be sure to call my L today. It also kind of shines some light on why she chose to do the following early on a Saturday evening. On top of all that, my S really doesn't like OM nor does he like his S. He calls them idiots while chuckle inside and don't say anything.

There WAS some good stuff mixed in this weekend. 50 mile group bike ride on Saturday morning. There was my community group with my church on Saturday night. I met with the prayer warriors at church on Sunday, went to service, and then went to the Student Ministries service.

Where does this leave me? Well, after that strong push back, TBH it pushes me away. I am seeing some nice possibilities in a potential relationship with someone else. I am seeing a huge contrast between the life she's living and the life I'm living at this point. She has verbalized to me, too, her observations some of those positive benefits of the life I'm living. She's said I seem happier, and she's remarked several times on how many friends I have now. Like I've seen it said here before, if she wants to come back or work on the M, she's going to make it abundantly clear - it won't be subtle.

Oh well, enough babbling for now.