H moved out Sat nite. We spent that nite at SILs. So last night was first night in house w/o him.

3 boys were up and down like whack-a-moles all night. I got about 3 hrs of sleep max--running on fumes.

H comes over thismorning (from his aptmt) after asking me yesterady if I minded him doing this...I said "sure, as long as you are consistently here."

Well, he comes over this morning and says he doesn't think he will be coming over in am's after all--not really any purpose (after he laid out all kinds of reasons yesterday).

He went to hug me as he has been when we leave each other and I pulled away first and the hug was not my usual "I really care about you hug." He chuckled and then said, "Your hugs are getting colder. That's all right. I deserve that, I guess."

I didn't say anything. Just looked at him.

Should I continue the pull-away first hug next time? Will he stop hugging me altogether if he thinks I don't want the hug? Should I give him a warmer hug next time?

I know I'm reading way too much into this, but I know our interactions are going to be much more limited now and I want to send the message that I still care, but you've hurt me and now things are going to be different until/unless you decide to move back (& leave OW).

HELP! I don't know how to BE around him now. I have so many mixed feelings and emotions going crazy!

M- 18 T-21
S-14,11 & 10
BD 6-18-2012 (OW-EA)
H moved out 11-3-2012
10-5-13 Me- I want a divorce. I want to move on w my life.
11-25-13 Jointly filed.